i went to speech follies just now!
it’s basically a show of all the best speeches of this year’s speech and debate team.
i really liked it because i think this year i connected with it more on a personal level.
a lot of the stuff, i could relate to myself.
andy’s speech about shyness.
ray’s speech about superheroes.
jason and amy’s speech about best friends.
ray and michelle’s speech about running and best friends.
ah. usually school events alienate me. i go to the winter assembly and watch all those dancers perform, and percussion, etc etc i think, i never dedicated myself to anything like that. i’m not good enough. not at their level.
but then this time, it’s different because after the show, i felt better about myself. like i was validated somehow. like everyone goes through the same problems, and that i can still overcome them. i still have a chance to become a different person on monday.
hmm.
everyone screws up in life, everyone feels awkward at times, but they don’t show it. they deal with it behind closed doors, with understanding friends and consoling family members. and then whether they get better or not, they show their best face to the world.
i have to do that too. i have to do that too! i deal with my shit at home, and i bring it to the outer world. i make others deal with my problems by acting like people should feel sorry for me or something for being miserable.
that’s so wrong!
i can’t be a superhero yet because i can’t even get over myself.
i have to stay consistent though…
i have to make decisive progress.
