let’s talk about my eating disorder
loljk let’s talk about guys.
i get a warm feeling sometimes, when i feel like i’m on to someone.
i really want to make it last for a long time
like a warm glow of a campfire from night to dawn.
sure, it eventually dies.
but lasting through the night
is a pretty darned long time in terms of campfire light. it just may be an analogy for a lifetime.
i just need a friend. not anything more right now. anything more would be nice, but a friend would be enough. a real one. not a fake one.
i need someone to make me feel normal again.
sometimes i get so tired of me, because i’m always going to act the same way tomorrow.
being loud is so fun, but it makes me feel so insecure.
i’m not made to be a person that people listen to.
i really want to keep people
and i refuse to accept that i lost people
even though i might. will.
todo:
stats hw. fosho.
english hw-mc corrections. eh. bring eng preppity book.
spanish hw. arghy dargh
great gatsby. start on that mofo.
physics tests tomorrow. okay great man awesome.
the feeling you get
when someone hates you and you can sense it in your bones.
i hate that feeling
i need to get so much confidence back in order to be the person i want to be.
i need to really reassess what is more important to me, my pride or seeking out my old friends that i don’t want to lose.
what is on the line really? revealing my shame? i don’t want to face him
i have to not let my fear of other people’s reactions prevent me from being a good friend.
in that sense, i am the most abysmal friend in the history of life.
